When engaging in most spiritual practices we usually wish to “quiet the mind” in order to be receptive to greater and more subtle awareness. When attempting to bring our mind to rest we often recognize that it is busy with many thoughts and seems to have its own agenda – often one counter to what we desire in our practice. In reference to this busyness we refer to “the monkey mind” or “the talking mind” and various traditions have developed strategies to “deal” with this “problem”.
Another way of looking at this phenomenon is to consider that the mind is doing a job we have given it and doing it well. The mind’s current job description may not have been assigned consciously so we have to do a little detective work to determine what the contract has become between us and our mind. Here are some factors that contribute to the development of the contract and the mind’s hard work to fulfill it.
- I expect to remember a lot of things, and I rely on my mind to do this. If I don’t remember something, then I berate my mind for forgetting. Since neural memory pathways work best if frequently used, the mind frequently brings things it is expected to remember to consciousness.
- Since timing is everything, I expect my mind to remind me of important things at the right time. However, since clock timing is artificial compared to biological timing, the mind’s best strategy to be sure to remind me at the correct time is to remind me frequently, just in case it is the correct time.
- I expect my mind to make sense of the world and understand what is going on. Since it is almost impossible to do this without great study, the mind simplifies and presents with certainty what is does “understand” and when confronted with something it doesn’t understand it often resorts to reorienting attention to what it does understand, or affirmation of basic tenants, values, and beliefs that are not necessarily true, but are comforting in the face of the complex and confusing world we live in. The alternative to this approach may be “analysis paralysis”, great confusion, or depression. When we begin to alter our awareness, as in meditation, the mind interprets this as just another aspect of “reality” it doesn’t understand and brings forward alternative thoughts as a “comfort” as a distraction from “confusion”.
- The desire to understand and “know” is further exacerbated in a family, group, culture and especially education systems, where intelligence is greatly valued, and ignorance is berated – either by ourselves or our peers. This adds even greater anxiety to the mind’s work of “knowing” and leads to greater mental activity in the light of the unknown. Especially if we know that there may be a discussion with someone (even worse if it’s a teacher) about the topic in the near future, and we may be asked to explain it – and we expect ourselves to be “right”. The mind desperately works to analyze, figure things out, and ironically, make up what we don’t really understand in order to be seen to be smart. This is the opposite of what is most effective in spiritual practice, however the mind is doing what it believes it is expected to do.
- We rely on our consciousness to define who we are. Our memories, thoughts, understandings, abilities all come from our mind and serve to constantly “recreate” ourselves and reassure us of our existence. Thus we have contracted with our mind to be the guardian of “us” (the status quo of who we are) and alert for anything that would threaten this. We expect to be the same person tomorrow as we are today, and our mind’s work is to do what it can to ensure that “mind altering” (and hence self altering) does not occur. Our minds become very good at using subtle awareness (including perhaps precognition) to anticipate when something is going on, or about to occur, that might cause a significant change in (threaten) who we are. When this possibility is detected then the mind’s job is to “get us out of Dodge”. The mind may distract us so we don’t take in the “toxic” energy that might threaten the status quo, or it may send us a physical signal (like having to attend to some bodily function) that serves to have us move away from the “threat”.
- In our “nano-second” world our minds are becoming more and more active. Multitasking, dealing with many issues in a day, solving problems and crises. This has led to greater and greater mind orientation and since we cram so much mental activity into our days, our effective attention span is shorter and shorter. We expect to be able to focus on something for a short period of time, get it sorted out and accomplished. Thus when we enter spiritual practice our mind utilizes the time to continue its job of solving problems, sorting out information and being blazingly efficient. Unfortunately, not what is required at the time.
Not only have we set up an impossible job for our minds, we have deluded ourselves that the contract is OK. When we come to realize that this contract with our minds exists we can become much more self compassionate when our mind starts to “distract” us from our spiritual work. The key is to end the divisive antagonism with our own minds. The technique of acknowledging our mind and gently bringing our awareness back to the spiritual focus we intend is effective. It may also be resourceful to revisit the job description in the contract and make some changes. As with any labor negotiation, establishing new roles may require some diligence. What can we do to establish a new contract?
- Give ourselves permission to not know, to not understand, to be confused, and be self compassionate with ourselves regarding this. Although easy to say, this is very challenging. There are a couple of ways to work toward this:
- Focus on the wonder of nature and the incredible complexity of life and ourselves. This recognition reinforces appreciation of the wonder and often leads to both acknowledgement and laughter about “understanding” it all. This place of wonder and openness is that of a child or beginners mind – before the rigors of schooling instilled the “need to know”.
- Reassure the little kids within us that they don’t have to know, we aren’t in grade school any more, they don’t have to fake it if they don’t know, and they won’t be punished for not knowing.
- Practice saying “I don’t know” and really mean it. This can become a mantra of humility and greatly shift our mental stance. (Note: it is important to distinguish “I don’t know” from “I don’t care”)
- Redefine what is important in our lives. Our usual stance is that we are engaged in life and spiritual work is an “add on”. Thus our minds retain their focus on what is the most important work. Redefining priorities is challenging, however when done with integrity, and this implies setting time and effort on spiritual work near the top of our daily to do list, the mind will begin to become a collaborator in what is important.
- Embrace change in who we are as a fundamental aspect of being alive. Again this is challenging, however without this embrace and openness the mind will continue to protect and block what it perceives as a threat to our identity. Embracing change is best done incrementally and can be reflected in experimenting with different foods, music, activities. These all begin the process of communicating to the mind that the plan is to be different tomorrow and in order to do that we need to be open and receptive – even to potentially big changes. This may bring us back to working with the inner kids again to reassure them that all this newness will not overwhelm them and that we are no longer in the position of vulnerability we were when we were little. This will encourage the mind to engage and welcome full sensory exploration of possibilities.
- Reassure the mind in its new role. Reassure the mind in its new role. Reassure the mind in its new role.
We can think of the goal in reworking our contract with our mind to be one of changing the mission of the mind to being an active partner in exploring the possibilities of what may be, and who we may become. The new prime directive: “explore possibilities with greatest curiosity”.
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© 2010 Rick Ellis. All rights reserved. ricknotes.com
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